"someone's shadow was on the sky"

Feb 20, 2006

I feel old. Accompanying your mom to surgery is not a little-kid thing. It's not a kid thing at all.
My mom decided that she wanted me to drive her to the hospital for her heart surgery (nothing major, no worries), and I was like "okay, no problem."
I didn't really expect the waking up at 5 to leave, or the moment when they say "we'll be taking her into the procedure room now" or the moment when she came out and had to lay still without moving for hours. Or even the time at the end of the day when they told me to go get the car and they would bring her down to the hospital door.
It was all very strange. For most of the day I sat and did homework, ate little meals in the cafeteria and watched Maury. But once an hour they would give me an update on the surgery, and when she was finished I sat in the recovery room with her. I felt like she was the kid and I was the mom while I gave her water to drink and steadied her when she finally got to stand up.
It wasn't only me, of course. My dad and sister came for a few hours while she was in surgery, but they left almost immediately after she came out. While they were there, I took the opportunity to drive home and take a shower, something I hadn't done in the morning.
She's doing fine, and she'll be up and about in a few days. But even though I knew that it was not a big deal, I was still terrified as they said "give your mom a hug for good luck" and wheeled her away. And I have never driven so carefully as when I brought her home.

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